


just because you can

by kat777



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Implied/Referenced Underage Drinking, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Post-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-15
Updated: 2014-02-15
Packaged: 2018-01-12 13:42:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1187412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kat777/pseuds/kat777
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nico takes a stunned moment to process the fact that <em>Percy Jackson is licking his neck<em></em></em>, and then he curses Jason to the very depths of Hades for talking him into coming to this thing. </p><p>OR, Percy drinks too much at a party and Nico has a choice to make.</p>
            </blockquote>





	just because you can

**Author's Note:**

> SPOILERS for up to _House of Hades_. There’s a bit of perceived dub-con, but Nico doesn’t go through with it so I didn’t tag it. Nico’s also underage (I think? I don't really know anything about age of consent laws and whatever else in New York) but they don’t actually have sex in this so I didn’t tag that either.
> 
> I don't own the PJO series or the HoO series, Rick Riordan does.

It comes out of nowhere, really, so it’s not like Nico could’ve avoided it. Not like he could’ve ever predicted that Percy, who is generally a very affectionate but nevertheless respectful of people’s personal space drunk, would tonight disregard whatever boundaries his inebriated-self normally adhered to. Specifically where Nico is concerned.

All this to say, there is no way anything about the current situation could possibly be Nico’s fault. Not Percy shuffling closer and closer to Nico as the night wore on until their sides were pressed together. Not Percy slipping his hand under Nico’s shirt fifteen minutes ago and resting it against the small of his back. Not Percy leaning in ten minutes after that and hooking his chin on Nico’s shoulder, turning his head slightly so he was breathing hot puffs of air against Nico’s neck, in and out, in and out.

It’s most definitely not Nico’s fault when Percy’s tongue makes a sudden appearance.

Nico takes a stunned moment to process the fact that _Percy Jackson is licking his neck_ , and then he curses Jason to the very depths of Hades for talking him into coming to this thing.

(“It’s my birthday,” he’d said. “You have to come to my 19th, Nico, I’m legal drinking age now.” To which Nico had replied, “Uh, no you’re not.” At which point Leo had popped up seemingly out of thin air and said, “He is in Canada! Guess where we’re partying on July 1st!”)

Like, what is Nico even supposed to do here? Percy Jackson, the boy he’s been crushing on since before he even hit puberty, is _licking his neck_. And making curious noises in the back of his throat, oh gods. Percy’s tongue disappears after a second, but then the hand he has on Nico’s back slips. Right, okay. Percy Jackson, saviour of Olympus at least five times over and straighter than the straightest ruler to ever straight, just licked Nico’s neck _and_ has his hand on Nico’s ass. Okay.

Nico has to get out of here. Before someone (READ: Percy) notices how much this is turning him on. He might have taken Jason’s advice last year and came out as gay to his friends (Nico’s not even supposed to _have_ friends, he’s supposed to spend his time in the Underworld trying to perfect his dad’s Creepy Stare™ which is kind of menacing but mostly just makes them both look like disgruntled cats), but he’s fought tooth and nail to keep his feelings for Percy a secret. Never mind that Hazel, Reyna, Piper, Annabeth, Frank, Leo _and_ Coach Hedge all figured it out on their own. Percy hasn’t, and Nico very much wants to keep it that way.

He briefly considers shoving Percy off and shadow travelling to, like, the South Pole, but… That’s a little harsh, right? Percy’s his friend now, and if Nico’s honest, he’s a good one. Ever since Nico returned to Camp Half-Blood and spilled (half of) his biggest secret, he’s been nothing but supportive. He always has time for Nico, whether Nico wants to spar, or talk, or just sit together in broody manly silence.

And then there’s the fact that Percy and Annabeth broke up nearly eight months ago. He’s still not sure what happened between them—all he can really do is speculate because it’s not his place to ask—but he knows they’re still the very best of friends, almost as close as they were before. So close, in fact, that it took Nico three weeks to even notice anything had changed.

 _Maybe…_ Nico thinks to himself. _Maybe this isn’t only because Percy’s wasted. Maybe Percy really does want this. Maybe he really does want_ me _._

Slowly, hesitantly, Nico lifts his right hand and very deliberately brushes it across Percy’s back, at the same time arching his neck so Percy’s mouth is back on his skin. Percy lets out a pleased little hum against his throat in response and tucks two fingers under the waistband of Nico’s jeans. He lifts his head up and whispers into Nico’s ear, “Let’s get out of here.”

Nico is sixteen, horny, and his long-time crush wants to drag him off somewhere private and presumably do indecent things to him. Who in their right mind would say no to that?

“Yeah,” he says breathlessly. “Yeah, let’s go.”

They make it to Percy’s hotel room (courtesy of Piper, as her dad is filthy stinking rich and celebrating Jason’s birthday in Quebec was her idea: “Good times there,” she’d said persuasively, a little charmspeak leaking through. “Free plane tickets and hotel rooms for everyone! Legal drinking age for everyone! Except Nico and Hazel!”) without incident and Percy shoves him up against the door. Then he’s trailing hot, open-mouthed kisses along Nico’s neck, across his jaw to the corner of his mouth, and this is the best thing that’s ever happened to Nico—

Percy is leaning in to kiss him properly on the lips for the first time when Nico inhales sharply through his nose, smells the alcohol on the other boy’s breath, and has a sudden attack of conscience so strong he pushes him away.

“What’s wrong?” Percy asks. He’s frowning. “Don’t you want this?”

“I— Yes, but—”

“Then what’s the problem?” Percy interrupts. He's beaming now; his smile is wide, if perplexed, and his eyes are so bright and it isn’t fair. Why can’t Nico have this? For once, why can’t he have what he wants?

Why _shouldn’t_ he get what he wants, just this once?

He makes up his mind.

He shoves Percy back a bit, towards the bed, and orders, “Take off all your clothes. Except your underwear.”

Percy’s smile turns wicked as he obeys, toeing off the loafers Annabeth made him wear and tossing them into the corner. Nico takes a second to be flattered by how quickly Percy’s socks, pants and shirt join his shoes, but then he’s all business, crowding Percy in against the bed, pushing him down onto it and—

Grabbing a spare blanket from on top of the chair by the bedside table and throwing it over Percy, who immediately starts to object, “What—”

“Goodnight, Percy,” Nico says, and he hates himself for how his voice breaks halfway through.

Whatever Percy intends to say to that, Nico doesn’t stay to find out. He steps back into the corner, lets the shadows wrap around him and take him to his cabin at Camp Half-Blood, where he collapses onto his bed and tries not to cry.

* * *

The worst part is, nothing changes. Nothing’s different. Either Percy doesn’t even remember what happened, or he does but it’s so inconsequential it has no effect on his behaviour whatsoever.

It’s probably the first one, Nico admits to himself in the middle of deliberating, for the fifth time since the night of Jason’s party, whether or not he should just shadow travel to the Underworld and live out the rest of his days as a hermit. No one seems to remember much of anything, except for Hazel, Reyna and Nico himself.

And yet, they can’t seem to stop talking about it. Frank can’t stop going on about how great it is that he actually got to spend Canada Day in _Canada_ again and with all his closest friends, no less. Leo can’t stop bragging about the fireworks show he’d coordinated which, if Nico’s honest, was amazing so he supposes Leo has the right to over-the-top bragging. Annabeth can’t stop grumbling about how she’s never drinking again, and any hypothetical pictures anyone may or may not have should be burned/deleted _or else_ —or else what, she doesn’t say, but no sane person dismisses a threat from Annabeth Chase.

Nico can’t escape it no matter what camp he’s at. And then, of course, there’s the birthday boy himself.

“That was the best birthday party I’ve ever had,” he says to Percy and Nico as they’re headed to lunch one day after giving the campers a demonstration of a _real_ swordfight. “Seriously, I didn’t think anything would ever beat that one birthday I spent with Piper in Rome a couple years ago—”

“You mean the one where Nico was dying in a jar and we went to go rescue him and almost drowned?” Percy asks doubtfully.

“Yeah, that one!”

Nico exchanges an unimpressed glance with Percy for a second before remembering that looking Percy in the eye makes him want to throw up. He turns to look at Jason instead, jerking his head around so fast he nearly gives himself whiplash.

Jason eyes him weirdly but doesn’t say anything about it. No, what he says next is far, far worse. “Everyone else seems to have enjoyed the party, too, but not as much as you guys, huh?” He’s smirking. Holy Styx, Nico is going to kill him.

“Uh, what do you mean?” Percy asks, and Nico definitely can’t look at him now. In fact, he’s convinced he’ll never be able to look at Percy Jackson ever again without dying a slow, painful death due to sheer mortification.

“What do I mean?” Jason echoes. He smiles at Percy like he thinks the older boy is being cute. “Oh, come on, we all saw you two leave the party early, and we know it wasn’t to play Mythomagic.”

 _Seriously_ , Nico is going to kill him. He doesn’t care how much it makes Piper and Leo cry, or how bad their revenge will be, he is actually going to _kill_ Jason this time.

Why is he _doing_ this? He’s kept Nico’s secret all this time, he’s been in Nico’s corner ever since their encounter with Cupid, why is he betraying him now? This isn’t like Jason at all.

 _Maybe he’s still drunk,_ Nico thinks wildly. _Maybe we’re all still drunk and Percy won’t remember any of this either._

Right. Still drunk, after nearly two weeks. Nico’s totally not grasping at straws here.

“I don’t—” Percy starts, and Nico can’t take this, can’t hear whatever denial Percy’s about to make.

“You know what,” he interrupts. “I’m not that hungry, I think I’ll skip lunch and take a shower instead.” Which is another thing, did Jason have to bring up the subject of Percy and Nico’s almost hook-up when Nico’s all sweaty and gross from the three-way fight?

“Nico—” Jason’s smile falters, like he’s just realizing he’s messed up big time.

“See you at dinner,” Nico says breezily. Ha. As if he’s actually going to stay for dinner when he can just shadow travel himself away from the embarrassing catastrophe that is currently his life.

Both Jason and Percy call out after him as he hurries away, but he doesn’t answer, doesn’t stop, doesn’t even pause for half a second.

 _Rio,_ he thinks to himself. _I’ve never been to Rio._

* * *

Except he really does take a shower, and by the time the hot water’s run out he’s talked himself out of it. Well, he hasn’t actually talked himself out of _leaving_ , but he’s at least talked himself into seriously considering other options.

When he’s done with his shower he pulls on underwear and a pair of old jeans, flops back onto his bed, and stares up at the ceiling for hours trying to think it all through, turning everything over in his mind again and again.

Maybe this will all blow over. Maybe Percy will act like it never happened, because for him it basically didn’t. Maybe… Maybe even if Percy doesn’t ignore it, even if he figures out how Nico feels about him and confronts him about it, maybe it’ll all be okay. Maybe he’ll just let Nico down gently and they’ll still be friends.

Nico thinks about that, pictures Percy apologizing for what had briefly been the best thing to ever happen to Nico. He imagines Percy telling him it was a mistake, it’ll never happen again, it didn’t _mean anything_ —

Nico sits up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed, and grips his knees tightly with his hands. After a second he raises one arm and scrubs at his wet eyes angrily. _Rio,_ he reminds himself. _There’s still Rio._

“Nico?”

Nico freezes. He makes sure his eyes are dry and then stands up, turning around to face the doorway slowly, _really_ slowly, like in one of those horror movies where the teen _knows_ it’s the ghost/monster/zombie/other behind them but until they actually see it there’s still hope it could be anything else.

Nico never used to watch horror movies. Percy’s the one who introduced him to them.

 _Anyone else,_ Nico prays, and he doesn’t know who he’s praying to because not even his dad would care enough to listen. _Literally_ anyone _else._

It’s Percy. Of course it’s Percy, standing there in the doorway with his hands in his pockets and his shoulders hunched in like he’s uncertain. Like he’s nervous about breaking poor little Nico di Angelo’s heart.

The thought makes Nico’s blood boil, to the point where when he speaks he’s nearly snarling. “Ever heard of knocking?”

“I did. Twice.” Huh. Nico didn’t hear a thing.

“What do you want?”

Percy flinches minutely at the harsh tone, but then he straightens up and replies in a steady voice, “You weren’t at dinner.”

“So?”

“You said you’d be there.”

“Something came up,” Nico lies. “I need to pack, my dad needs me in the Underworld.”

“You’re lying,” Percy states matter-of-factly, and it’s infuriating, that Percy can see through him immediately, that Percy knows him so well. How could Nico have ever let that happen? Why did he ever come back?

 _You were lonely,_ a voice inside him whispers. _You didn’t have anyone._

Nico doesn’t bother to deny it, because it’s true. He didn’t have anyone. And when he leaves, he’ll have no one again.

He’s leaving anyway.

“You can’t leave,” Percy says, like he’s reading Nico’s mind.

“ _You_ can’t tell me what to do—”

“I’m sorry!”

Nico blinks, stunned by the way the words just _burst_ out of Percy, and he almost doesn’t notice when Percy continues, “I’m sorry okay? I should have—I should’ve apologized to you sooner. I should’ve never done anything in the first place. It was a mistake, I didn’t mean to—”

That is literally the _worst_ thing Percy could’ve possibly said, given that it’s almost exactly what Nico expected to hear. “Oh, _of course_ you’re sorry,” Nico interrupts and his tone is mocking, biting, despite the fact that in his head, he’s just wishing he was wearing a shirt and pants that aren’t ripped all over the place because he’s about to expose himself enough as it is. “Of course you’re sorry that you ever touched poor little Nico di Angelo. Of course you’re sorry that you ever deluded him into thinking you could possibly _want_ him.”

“Nico, what—” Percy begins, but Nico’s on a roll here, he’s not about to stop.

“Well, you _should_ be sorry, and you don’t even know why, do you? You have _no idea_.” Percy stares at him helplessly. He really doesn’t know, he really doesn’t understand, and that knowledge makes the fight drain right out of Nico.

“I’ve had a crush on you since we first met,” Nico finally confesses, and as soon as he’s said it he wishes he could take it back. _A crush,_ he tells Percy, but it’s not a crush, not anymore. It hasn’t been for months now, since he came back to Camp and Percy befriended him for real.

Percy looks…completely poleaxed, to be honest. It would be funny if Nico hadn’t just spilled his darkest secret to the one person he never wanted to find out about it.

“But, um, but that was like six years ago,” Percy says dumbly.

“Yeah, it’s, uh, kind of pathetic, huh.” Nico laughs a little and it sounds so forced one would think he’s being held at gunpoint. “Pining hopelessly after the straight boy with the gorgeous girlfriend for six years.”

At first, Percy just stares some more. Then he says, “I wasn’t dating Annabeth for that long.”

Really? That’s all he has to say? “No, but you were obsessed with her for that long,” Nico snaps back, and then feels bad. “I mean, not obsessed. Just. You liked her.” He swallows hard. “You loved her.”

(Half of Nico is sort of convinced Percy still does, and any moment now he’ll say, _S_ _ayonara, sucker,_ and run off to get back together with Annabeth.)

Nico can see the realization dawning in Percy’s face, can see that it’s finally hitting him just how much this has been killing Nico all this time, and all Nico can think is how glad he is for the bed between them, for the physical distance between them that matches the figurative one he is sure will never be closed.

Percy’s quiet for a while, staring first at Nico and then down at his hands like he’s hoping they’ll tell him what to say. Eventually he looks up, meeting Nico’s eyes, and Nico waits for more apologies to spill forth from those lips he dreams about far more often than he would ever be willing to admit.

Instead, Percy draws Riptide out of his pocket and says, “I’ve learned how to write with it, but I’m not sure if it ever runs out of ink, I haven’t used it very much.”

Wow. _Wow_ , Nico knows Percy can be a bit of a dick sometimes, but this a new low for him. Nico’s just handed him his heart on a silver platter and he’s going to completely ignore it to talk about his _stupid_ pen/sword?

“Good for you,” Nico says, and he’s so mad he’s shaking. “You can take your _stupid_ pen and shove it up your—”

“I’ve also tried surfing recently,” Percy continues as if Nico hadn’t spoken, slipping Riptide back into his pocket. “But I’d say I’m only average at it, water powers don’t really help me keep my balance.”

“Percy—”

“Thalia and I do fight pretty often when we see each other, but I think that’s more about our personalities than our dads. And as for Annabeth—” Percy grins at him lazily. “No, she is most definitely _not_ my girlfriend.”

It takes a couple of minutes of Nico floundering in confused and angry silence before it hits him.

“Those are—I asked you, when we first met—” he breaks off, staring at Percy incredulously.

“Yeah,” Percy says, still grinning, but less lazily now and more like…like Nico’s being endearing, or something. “You asked a lot of questions. A lot of _really annoying_ questions. I don’t remember them all, but the ones I did remember… Well, I figured better late than never.”

“I.” Nico blinks. He wants so badly to cry right now but he _can’t_ , not in front of Percy Jackson. “I don’t understand.”

Is that really his voice? He sounds so small.

Percy’s grin disappears, his expression softening until it’s so gentle Nico feels like glass. “I’m sorry for all the hurt I’ve caused you. I’m sorry for how I treated you for years. But I can’t—” He takes a deep breath. “I can’t say I wish I could change the fact that I didn’t return your feelings all that time. I know you always hated it when I treated you like a kid, but that’s what you were. It wouldn’t have been right, if I felt anything like that for you at the time. And I can’t apologize for what I had with Annabeth. I would never apologize for that. We were amazing together. We loved each other, and I needed her, and she needed me. I would never take any of that back. We wouldn’t have even survived this long if we hadn’t had each other.”

“I don’t get why you’re telling me all this,” Nico mumbles when Percy finally pauses in his speech. “I already know. I know it’s not your fault that you don’t like me that way anymore than it’s my fault that I lo—like you that way.” Not that Nico had always known that. It took him a long time to stop recklessly laying blame at everyone’s feet, especially his own.

“No, you don’t—” Percy laughs, sort of, just a quick huff of amusement. “You _really_ don’t understand. I’m saying… I’m trying to say, I didn’t like you like that before, and I can’t truly be sorry for that because it had to be that way.”

And Nico nods, still confused because he _knows_ all this and he’s already said as much.

“But,” Percy continues, and there’s something odd seeping into his tone now. Something that Nico’s been hearing at random moments for months now, like when he sleeps in and is late for breakfast and Percy ruffles his hair and says, “Morning, sleepyhead,” or that time he was injured while trying to get a younger camper’s necklace back from the Myrmekes and Percy came to visit him in the infirmary and told him he was too nice for his own good, which is nearly the _stupidest_ thing Nico has ever heard because he’s not _nice_ , he’s the son of Hades, it’s just that the girl’s older brother had bought her that necklace and it was all she had left of him.

“But,” Percy repeats, like he knows Nico’s thoughts have run away with him again. Like he knows Nico so well he’s pretty much crawled into his brain (into his heart) and made his home there. “I _would_ like to apologize for the past eight months.”

Yes, that’s how long Nico’s been hearing that odd… _whatever_ in his voice. Is that what he’s apologizing for? Nico’s heart sinks. He might not understand it, whatever it is, but he knows he doesn’t want to hear Percy apologizing for it.

“Oh.” Nico looks down at his feet, shuffles them around a bit, and it suddenly occurs to him again that he’s half-naked. He wants to cross his arms over his chest because he’s not like Percy or Jason or even Frank. He’s not scrawny like Leo, not anymore, and he’s not pale, not after spending the past year in the Upperworld which gave him back his natural olive complexion, but. He’s not. Well, he’s just not…attractive. Not like Percy. Percy’s beautiful. Nico’s always thought so, and that’s always been part of the problem.

“If you want me to be really specific,” Percy clarifies, “I’d like to apologize for not doing what I did at Jason’s party every day for the past eight months.”

Nico doesn’t say anything to that, just stares uncomprehendingly at Percy. He’s 99% sure he heard wrong, and if he heard right than he must be misinterpreting the words.

Percy blows out an exasperated breath and says, “Oh, for Poseidon’s sake, I’m trying to tell you I like you too.”

“What.”

“I like you too. That’s why I broke up with Annabeth. After you came back from the Underworld, you know, we started spending all this time together and I just sort of. Fell a bit head over heels, and it turned out Annabeth was falling for someone else, too, so we called it quits. And I’m not straight, by the way. I’m not sure what I am, Annabeth kept throwing around the word 'bisexual' whatever _that_ means, but I’m most definitely not straight.”

There’s a long pause where Nico turns this new, startling information over in his mind.

“You’re making this up,” he says suspiciously.

“Nico, come on, how cruel do you think I am?”

And the thing is Nico _knows_ Percy’s not that cruel, and he looks so offended that in any other situation Nico would believe him, but…

“Okay, but—” Nico flails around for a bit trying to think of how to counter what Percy’s said before jabbing his finger in Percy's direction triumphantly and exclaiming, “But how come you’ve been acting like nothing happened for like the past two weeks? If you really liked me, why didn’t you say anything?"

“Why didn’t I remind the guy I liked about the time I made a move on him and he turned me down, tossed a blanket at me and literally escaped as fast as demi-godly possible?”

“But you were drunk!” Nico protests, flailing around some more and this time not just in his head. “I saw you earlier that night, you had so many drinks and then you kept stumbling into everything and you told Annabeth she was being a wet-blanket for threatening to tell the bartender to cut you off.”

Patiently, Percy says, “Yeah, and then she stomped on my foot and stole the next five drinks I ordered, which got her completely wasted, and Annabeth when she’s wasted is so much fun I decided to sober up so I could enjoy it properly and pretend to be all morally superior in the morning. By the time I made a move on you I was…well, I wasn’t a hundred percent sober, or else I wouldn’t have had the guts to do anything, but I certainly wasn’t drunk.”

“So. When you said you’d made a mistake, before, and you didn’t mean to…” Nico begins, at the same time hesitantly coming around to the other side of the bed so he's standing right in front of Percy.

“Touching someone without their permission isn’t cool,” Percy says, shrugging his shoulders. “It’s even less cool when they don’t want anything to do with you, which I thought you didn’t.”

“Oh. Well. I did, I really wanted—” Nico breaks off and tries again, “I just, I just thought you were drunk and taking advantage of someone who’s drunk isn’t cool either, so.”

They stare at each other for about thirty seconds before Percy grins. “Gods, we’re complete idiots, aren’t we?”

“Complete idiots,” Nico agrees feelingly.

“That’s why Jason said what he did earlier, you know,” Percy tells him. “I asked him after you ran off, and he said he thought we’d hooked up that night and then pretended it never happened, and he knew we liked each other so he thought maybe if he brought it up we might stop being so stupid and work it out.”

“I’d probably kill him for that if it had turned out you didn’t like me back,” Nico notes out loud.

“Yeah,” Percy says, stepping in close to Nico until there's barely any distance between them, “but it turns out I do, so maybe you should kiss me instead.”

And Percy smiles, just as widely as he did the night of the party, and his eyes are just as bright, and _Nico can have him_ , if he wants, and he does, oh, he _does_.

When he leans in to kiss Percy, he doesn’t smell alcohol on his breath this time, just something vaguely chocolaty, and Nico wonders what they had for dessert after dinner today. Hot fudge sundae? Black forest cake?

Nico touches his lips to Percy’s and curls his tongue into Percy’s open mouth, searching for a taste to match the scent, just because he can.

**Author's Note:**

> Jason was kinda OOC, huh? I figured it wouldn't matter that much since he's barely in the fic at all.


End file.
